Crash Analysis: HARD RIDE TO HELL (2011)

One big flat tire that will flip your bike and give you major road rash

Friends in an RV are ravaged by the biker gang from hell.

From ROBOCOP to THE NIGHT-FLIER, I’ve always enjoy Miguel Ferrer’s acting. However, with his body of work, I can’t even begin to guess why he would star in such a low grade and awful project such as this.

We’ve seen it all before: A group of young to semi-young somethings, a trip to the middle of nowhere, laughs and booze, then the bad thing (people, ghost, what-have-you) show up, no phone service and the nearest town is lightyears away… You know what I mean. But it’s not that this is just formulaic, it’s very poorly shot and poorly executed.

Now, Penelope Buitenhuis has been directing since 1989 and David Pelletier has been the director of photography on nearly forty-five projects. It’s clear that the budget wasn’t there. However, that’s no excuse for bad camera angles and sterile shots.

The story was also drawn out and plagued with stock characters: the screaming girl, the cool guy you hope makes it, the hesitant hero… Then again, this movie came with three writers, and as we’ve seen far too many times: the more writers, the worse the story. And somewhere along the line, someone decided to amp up the melodrama, while turning a character into one of the worse pseudo-heroes of all time.

Ferrer may not had been his best, but he certainly wasn’t even close to bad. However, the one standout in this ill-fated monstrosity is the work of Brent Stait who was spot-on in every scene. Then again, Stait is one hell of a character actor who has appeared in many a movie and television show, most notably “Andromeda” from 2000-2004. Due to his character and efforts, it’s the only reason I rode along to the end.

1 out of 5 stars

 

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